As the holidays roll around this year, I look back and wonder where time went. But then I look forward and realize that time has just begun. I have so much to be thankful for this year...my wonderful husband and I celebrated our 4 year wedding anniversary this summer, we have two beautiful, healthy little girls and I get to spend every day with them, watching them grow and become the wonderful people they were meant to be.
This all hit home for me a few days ago when I sent a text message to a friend of mine who was expecting her first child. My first text said, simply "Hey! How are you doing?" She replied with "I'm doing ok." So then I asked her if she knew the sex of the baby yet. She then informed me that she had lost the baby two months ago. Wow. First I felt like an awful friend for letting that much time go by without talking to her, and then second, and more obviously, I felt like a jerk for bringing it up. I mean, granted, I had no idea, but I still can't imagine having to deal with a loss like that and then to have someone ask about the baby.
She said she and her husband were getting better, dealing with the pain and left it at that. I told her I'm always here if she needed to talk to me, but I know her well enough to know she probably won't talk to me. She was always a very private person.
After that conversation, I just sat here and thought about how awful it would have been if I had lost one of my girls, even before I met them. I know how lucky I am every day, but having something like this happen just makes me even more aware of the blessings I've received in life. Sure, I complain from time to time about tantrums and sleep deprivation, but if I couldn't imagine life any other way, this is the norm.
So, while the holidays have always been a special time for me, this year they mean just a little bit more. I'm just so happy that I get to spend them with my lovely family.